A NEW MEDICARE BENEFIT:

You're a sick senior citizen and the government says there is no nursing home available for you. So what do you do? Our plan gives anyone 65 years or older a gun and four bullets. You are allowed to shoot four politicians. Of course, this means you will be sent to prison where you will get three meals a day, a roof over your head, central heating, air conditioning and all the health care you need!

Need new teeth? No problem. Need glasses? That's great. Need a new hip, knees, kidney, lungs or heart? They're all covered. As an added bonus, your kids can come and visit you as often as they do now. And who will be paying for all of this? It's the same government that just told you that they cannot afford for you to go into a home.

And you can get rid of four useless politicians while you are at it. Plus, because you are a prisoner, you don't have to pay any income taxes anymore.

The downside is that range time isn't covered....