WILL ROGERS, who died in a 1935 plane crash, was one of the greatest political sages this country has ever known. Some of his sayings:

Never slap a man who's chewing tobacco.

Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.

There are two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither works.

Never miss a good chance to shut up.

Always drink upstream from the herd.

If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.

The quickest way to double your money is to fold it and put it back into your pocket.

There are three kinds of men: The ones that learn by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence and find out for themselves.

Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

If you're riding' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there.

Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin' it back.

After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him. The moral: When you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.

From my email.

HAH! Speaking truth to 'gender studies' power. About time.

NANCY PELOSI: “It is almost a false wrong to say we have a spending problem. We have a deficit problem that we have to address."

Good Lord, where to start? Is a 'false wrong' a right? If so, is it correct 'to say we have a spending problem'? And if we don't have a spending problem, why do we have a deficit?

My head hurts....

THE POLL RESULTS ARE IN: gun control lost.

WHERE HAS all that ammo gone? And why?

My wife and I were blowing holes in targets today and after finishing up, we went in to replenish our supplies. Limit: one box (50 rounds) each of .22LR and 9mm. I've still got plenty of 9mm ammunition, but I'm having to dip into my reserves for .22LR as we shoot well over 50 rounds each time we go to the range.

MORE LIKELY, global warming causes asteriods.

When these people were conceived, God must have thought "You're going to be too stupid to be productive, so I'll make you a journalist."

YOU CAN GET OBAMACARE, but your family can't.

A PICTURE: Woman at Military Cemetery.

MOCK THEM: "There has been no statement from a White House 'truth team' regarding the veracity of the president going skeet-shooting in a pink tutu."

A PRAYER BREAKFAST might not have been the best forum, but the words needed to be said.

I HATE TO ADMIT IT, but perhaps ObamaCare will have one useful -- if unintended -- consequence.

NEW HEALTH GUIDELINES: no birthday cake candles allowed for Australian children. At least the Australian Medical Association has shown some common sense.

"THE WASHINGTON POST REPORTS that Jack Lew, President Obama’s nominee for Treasury Secretary, held money in an investment fund registered in the very Cayman Islands building that Obama called a notorious haven for tax abuse."

In the Obama administration, hypocrisy has no limits.

SICK SUPPORT for a killer. I wonder if these twits realize that in the anarchist utopia they think they believe in -- free of cops and laws and where everyone can 'do their own thing' -- they will be among the first to be enslaved or killed.

CAN'T BUY A 30-ROUND MAGAZINE for your AR-15? Print one.

IT HAPPENED AGAIN ... and again ... and again.